What Our Kids Teach Us About Happiness

What Our Kids Teach Us About Happiness. When it comes to following your bliss, kids have the art down pat. Here, moms share the make-you-smile secrets they've learned from their little ones. One day, on my way home from a run of errands gone bad, I swung by to pick up my son, Nate, then 8, who'd been playing at a friend's house. While he chattered about the fun he'd had, my mind churned through all I'd failed to get done. "Will Dad be home for dinner?" he asked. "Think so," I said. "Great! What are we having?" he asked. Good question. "Uh, how about macaroni and cheese?" I replied. A deep sigh of contentment came from the backseat. "I love my life," Nate said. His words were like a mood defibrillator. My son's simple satisfaction lifted me straight out of my autopilot loop of worry and let me see my life with fresh appreciation: I was driving down a beautiful mountain road on a glorious summer's day with my wonderful son, with the prospect of a cozy family dinner at home — I loved my life, too! What else do kids have to teach you about enjoying life? A lot. Read on for 11 more real moms' aha! moments. Choose your mood "When my daughter, Jessica, was a preschooler, she was learning all about choices — you can have a cookie or a scoop of ice cream, but not both; you can wear the green sweater or the blue one, but not both. She was also learning about emotions, and she'd ask, 'Is Mama happy? Is Mama sad? Is Mama mad?' One especially trying day, after I'd yelled a lot, she asked, 'Is Mama mad?' I told her, 'No, Mama's not mad anymore.' And she said, 'Mama picked happy!' She was right! I was struggling very hard to calm down, so I was choosing to be happy. Now every time I veer toward a rotten mood, I try to remember I can 'pick happy.'" — Jennifer Lawler, 41, Lawrence, KS Love generously
"My son, Jonathan, 6, is constantly teaching me how to express love -- with passion, creativity, and volume. In the supermarket, he'll shout, 'Mom, I love you more than all the blades of sand on the beach!' and plant a kiss on my cheek. While watching TV, he'll squeeze his baby sister and declare, 'You are so cute I can't stand it!' He shows me that the path to happiness is appreciating those you love and telling them so as often as you can."

— Karen Reivich, 40, Narberth, PA

Skip a little
"When my daughter, Deanna, was 5, she skipped everywhere. It didn't matter what the occasion -- holidays, parties, going to the store — she skipped. When I asked her why, she told me skipping made her happy. 'You can't be mad and skipping, Mom,' she said. And it's true! So we skip -- I skip, she skips, even my husband skips."

— Daphne Bahamonde, 35, Rochester, NY

Turn to-do's into to-enjoys "One fall, my then 1 1/2-year-old son, Brent, and I were raking leaves in our yard. As he played nearby, I was overexerting myself and practically cursing all the trees for having made such a mess. Then I looked over at my son. He was in an area I hadn't raked yet, stepping on the dry leaves to hear the crackling noise they made, and smiling happily. He taught me that some chores are pleasures if you choose to look at them that way."

--Kris Porotsky, 34, Cincinnati

Redefine success "One day, my 4-year-old, Megan, went with me to the post office to mail orders for my online retail business. I was wishing I had 77 orders to mail rather than a paltry seven. Meanwhile, Megan was excitedly counting the orders into the drop box, exclaiming, 'Mommy! There are seven new people who are going to love your work!' She reminded me to take pleasure in what I had accomplished instead of being disappointed by what I hadn't."

— Beth Butler, 46, Tampa

Recapture your childhood bliss "While swinging one day, my son, James, 3, closed his eyes and stretched out his arms as the wind blew through his hair. He had the most delightful smile — one of pure pleasure — the kind you only see on a child's face. I decided to swing next to him, closing my eyes and letting my senses guide me, just like he did. I heard the wind in my ears and felt the rhythm of swinging. In that moment I experienced complete freedom and sheer pleasure."

— Laura Lundy, 42, Nelson, BC

Go on impulse "When my daughter was 2, she was helping me 'fold' the laundry when she suddenly stripped off her nightgown, put on a pair of her daddy's clean undies (which came up to her armpits), and started dancing. She was so carefree. It made me realize that I need to cut loose and enjoy myself more — not wearing my hubby's underpants, but in other ways."

— Pam Stahler, 45, Littleton, CO

Be a best friend
"My daughter's best friend got home from school early one day and called with big news. Both she and my 6-year-old daughter had lost a tooth on the same day, at the very same hour! I learn so much about happiness from watching my daughter with her friend — seeing the way they care for each other, copy each other, sing together, even fight and make up. They remind me of how much I love my best friend, Laura, and to always take good care of our friendship."

— Miriam Peskowitz, 42, Mt. Airy, PA

Spread joy — insist on it!
"My toddler is so crazy about carrots that he often has one in each hand all day long. Once, he really wanted me to have some, and with sticky fingers covered in yogurt, he shoved his carrot in my mouth. He was so happy that he squealed, 'Bah!' at the top of his lungs when I took a bite. It was a reminder of the happiness that comes from sharing something we love with others."

— Jennifer Margulis, 36, Ashland,

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Pursue your passion "Nicholas, my 9-year-old son, is quite the artist. He needs to draw every day. I still remember how a few nights before he started kindergarten, he came downstairs way past his bedtime, paper in hand, exhausted. He said, 'I'm really tired, but I just have to color!' His passion for art reminds me how happy I am to be a writer, and I think of what he said whenever I get a rejection letter."

— Jen Singer, 39, Kinnelon, NJ

Savor joy while it lasts
"My 3-year-old son, Nate, loves cars. On one car ride, he was taking in the view of zillions of cars on the Ben Franklin Bridge when, to his delight, a big purple bus painted all over in ads rolled by. He took it all in with great glee. Then he raised a hand, said, 'Bye-bye!' and turned his head and fell asleep. Nate's happiness lesson: Don't cling to moments of perfect joy, just relish them and have faith that more will come."

- Andi Buchanan, 35, Philadelphia

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